Winners' Chapel (also known as Living Faith Church) is a mega church founded by Bishop David Oyedepo in 1981.

On May 1 and 2 1981, in a long drawn out 18 hour vision in a certain 'International Hotel' in Ilesa, Old Oyo State, Brother David Oyedepo, a native of Omu-Aran in Kwara State, Nigeria received a mandate that "The hour has come to liberate the world from all oppression and wickedness of Satan through the preaching of the word of faith; and I am sending you to undertake this task". Immediately after this, he sent the message to all his friends and the 'Powerhouse', a group of about 70 members, praying and fellowshipping under the aegis of 'Faith Liberation Hour', a weekly programme was established. The church had its first and commissioning service in Ilorin, Kwara State, Northern Nigeria on September 17, 1983 and Pastor Enoch Adejare Adeboye of the Redeemed Christian Church of God commissioned the ministry. At inception, there came an instruction to move to 'Damascus' which was understood to be Kaduna. The Kaduna branch consisted of four members and is now known as the "Garden of Faith". During a Powerhouse meeting in April 1982, Brother David Oyedepo listed seven areas where God had spoken to him concerning the future of the ministry. He stated that "at the base of the commission will be a tent which will sit 50,000 people". He stated that very soon there will be millions gathering at the base to listen to the gospel. He added that he saw them flying with the gospel on wings which showed that soon the ministry will have her own aircraft. He added that the whole world will soon be able to hear the message of the commission from the base. At that time, the internet as we know it today was not in view. At the inception of the ministry, David Oyedepo got instruction to commit the spoken word into writing with the same measure of proof. This led to the establishment of the Dominion Publishing House which won the Economic Community of West African States (ECOWAS) Gold Award in 1996 and has produced over 7 million books till date.

In 1987 while in the United States he got an instruction from God to "Get back home and make my people rich". This served as a major thrust for the prosperity message of the commission. He was ordained as a "Bishop" by the late Archbishop Benson Idahosa of the Church of God Mission in 1988. During the church's Easter Faith convention in April 1987, Pastor David Oyedepo announced that the church was to begin to spread out and on 27 May, 1987, exactly a month later, the first five branches of the church were established in 5 Nigerian towns namely Mubi, Azare, Biu, Maiduguri and Bauchi. In 1989, Bishop Oyedepo received a vision from God to "Get down to Lagos and raise me a people". This set the stage for the Lagos branch to start up in September 1989 with the name "Winners Chapel". The first service in Lagos had about 300 people in attendance. By December 1993, the Lagos church had 3,000 worshippers and by December 1994 it had increased to 10,000 members. In 1996, Archbishop Benson Idahosa was invited to dedicate the church's Iyana Ipaja facility located at Raji Oba Street. This consisted of a 3,000 seater auditorium with overflow facilities for 30,000 as well as an eight (8) floor tower which was the World Mission Agency headquarters. This $50 million (N7.5 Billion) facility was already largely inadequate in less than 2 years of its existence. The church membership increased to 75,000 in single services by the middle of 1999. The name "Winners Chapel" soon became the popular name of the church even more so than the original name "The Living Faith World Outreach Centre" (LFWOC). Kaduna worshippers however still love to go by the name “Garden of Faith". The Garden of Faith is the national headquarters of the church. In 1993, the Vice-President of the Living Faith Church and then senior Pastor of the Maiduguri church, Pastor David Abioye was ordained "Bishop". Bishop Abioye is an exemplary leader and an epitome of faithfulness in the Living Faith church and Christendom as a whole. Driving back to Kaduna from Zaria after a meeting on May 4 1994, Bishop Oyedepo heard a call from God that "The harvest of Africa was over-ripe and that he should rush in and preserve it from decadence". On May 8, 1994, the mandate was dedicated with a giant map of Africa and on January 15, 1995, the first missionaries left the shores of Nigeria. As at September 2010, Winners Chapel has branches in at least 63 cities in 48 African countries. The mandate to Africa is known as the African Gospel Invasion Program (AGIP). The foreign mandate is an arm of the World Mission Agency (WMA) of the ministry. In 2000, the prompting came to reach out beyond Africa and this mandate is now known as the "Mission to the World" (MTW). As at September 2010, there are at least 10 branches of Winners Chapel in the USA in cities like Houston, Georgia, New York, New Jersey, Maryland, Chicago, Dallas, Philadelphia, Minnesota and Massachusetts. There are also branches in the UK, UAE, Belgium, The Caribbean, Canada, China, Malaysia, South Korea and Japan among others all over the world; in Nigeria alone, there are about 3,000 local branches and about 24,000 satellite fellowships in the Lagos area. The Commission has 12 Pillars known as The Pillars of Faith. The Pillars are The Word, Faith, The Supernatural, The Holy Spirit, Prosperity, Prayer, Healing, Wisdom, Success, Vision, Consecration and Praise. The church teaches the importance of faith and that both divine healing and material prosperity are benefits of submission to God's will. It belongs to the Renewal.^[1]

The international headquarters of Winners Chapel is called Faith-Tabernacle. It covers about 70 acres (280,000 m²) and is built inside an over 10,500-acre (42 km²) church complex called Canaanland, the international headquarters of the ministry in Ota, a suburb of Lagos. The building took 12 months to be completed. The foundation laying took place on August 29, 1998 and the announcement of the time frame of one year for the building project was announced on September 13, 1998 by Bishop Oyedepo at the Iyana Ipaja church while work began on September 18, 1998. The dedication of the building took place on September 19, 1999 with 97,800 people in attendance. Faith Tabernacle is presently the largest church building in the world, with a sitting capacity of 50,400 people and an outside overflow capacity of over 250,000, with three services every Sunday. Construction completed in Canaanland till date is estimated to be not less than $600 million(N90 Billion) with an additional Canaan City estate currently in construction which will be the largest housing estate in Africa and easily one of the largest in the world with 15,000 housing units and at a cost of N250 Billion or $1.6 Billion. This is part of a grander scheme of 150,000 houses to be built by the church. Faith Tabernacle is the fulfillment of the vision delivered in April 1982. Over 300,000 people have been counted at single meetings at Canaanland. Canaanland was procured in 1998 and was initially 560 acres (2.3 km²). Presently it is over 10,500 acres (42 km²) and will take about 120 km to navigate around it. As an educationist, Bishop David Oyedepo's mission currently pioneers the establishment of educational institutions at all levels in and outside Nigeria, including the recently established "HEBRON" or Covenant University with over 7,000 students as well as Faith Academy with 1,500 students both located in Canaanland. Covenant University was well documented in a Nigerian Television Authority (NTA) documentary on the Nigerian 50th independence anniversary because of landmark achievements in its few years of existence. Covenant University was adjudged the best private university in Nigeria in 2005 and one of the goals of the institution is to be among the best in the world by or before 2020. According to Bishop Oyedepo, "Covenant University is not just an institution; it is a revolution in education". Faith Academy on the other hand placed fourth of all secondary schools in Nigeria during the 2010 Senior secondary Certificate Examination (SSCE). The second university of the church known as Landmark University in Omu Aran, Kwara State was approved by the Nigerian Government in March 2011 and immediately resumed academic activities the same month with about 1000 students. Construction at Landmark university is estimated to be in the realm of at least $50 million (N7 billion) so far while Bishop Oyedepo insists that 'spending continues'. Landmark University (LU) has the mandate of spearheading an agrarian revolution in Nigeria. Bishop David Oyedepo stated in August 2010 that it takes a ride of more than 100 km to go around the walls of Landmark University. Landmark University consists presently of 1,400 acres. There are strong plans for about 5 more universities to be constructed across Africa including Abuja and Calabar in Nigeria, Ghana, Democratic republic of Congo and Kenya as announced by Bishop Oyedepo during Shiloh 2007. 1,000 acres have already been acquired for the university in Ghana while 300 hectares (about 750 acres) have been acquired for the Congo University and this is going to be a French speaking university. Recently, President Yahya Jammeh of The Gambia appealed to the World Mission Agency (WMA) of the Living Faith Church to build a university in The Gambia. Some other projects that were announced during the initial foundation laying in Canaanland in 1999 include a towering administrative headquarters and 500 bed hospital among many other projects.

Winners' Chapel also runs a chain of about 12 Secondary schools and over 50 Primary and nursery schools in Nigeria. The secondary schools are known as Faith Academies except those located in within the universities known as Covenant University and Landmark University Secondary Schools respectively. The Nursery and Primary Schools are known as Kingdom heritage Model Schools (KHMS). Some of the secondary schools are located in Badagry, Iyana Ipaja, Ibadan, Asaba, Kaduna, Ilorin and Osogbo. The mission is presently working on plans to build at least a secondary school each in every country in Africa. It also has its own Bible School, called Word of Faith Bible Institute (WOFBI); this is the biggest such group in Nigeria with branches in over 30 countries worldwide including the United States of America, the United Kingdom and the United Arab Emirates. As at 2004, WOFBI had trained over 100,000 people all over Africa. WOFBI has 15 campuses in the Lagos Area alone. Other assets of the Church are three aircraft including a Challenger 604 with call sign "N664D" which is listed in the Forbes 500. The Church aircraft fleet is known as the Dominion Airlines which are used strictly for missionary work and the church has also procured an aircraft Hangar at the Murtala Muhammed International Airport, Lagos. Construction is presently going on at the Hangar costing about $2.5 million (N350 million). The church has a fleet of over 400 buses that convey worshippers to and from Faith-Tabernacle, Canaanland. In August 2010, the church procured another fleet of 100 brand new buses. The second aircraft is parked at the Nnamdi Azikiwe Airport, Abuja for use by the vice president, Bishop David Abioye. The Church also owns Dominion Publishing House, which turns out books and other materials written by David and Faith Oyedepo and David Abioye. Bishop Oyedepo has written over 70 books apart from many also written by Bishop Abioye and Pastor (Mrs) Faith Oyedepo. An arm of the Ministry, World Mission Agency (WMA) provides welfare and other health and humanitarian services to the needy in the society. An annual amount of N100,000,000 (One hundred million naira)or $700,000 (Seven hundred thousand dollars) is administered in scholarships for education up to first degree level to church members through the David Oyedepo Scholarship Scheme and channeled through the Satellite Fellowships where membership is validated. Automatic scholarship is also available to all children members of primary school age. After the bomb blast that rocked the Ikeja Cantonment at the turn of the last decade, the Red Cross announced that the consignment from the Winners Chapel was the largest by a single organization since the Nigerian Civil War. Also, the WMA has moved aggressively into Koma hills in Northern Nigeria where it sunk 47 boreholes in 1997 and built nursery, primary and secondary schools. The Church also provided relief to Liberian citizens during the Liberian Civil War. The Winners Chapel is currently undertaking the construction of "Goshen" which is a camp like Canaanland in Abuja and is along kilometer 26, Abuja-Keffi Road. It has an ultra-modern auditorium which accommodates over 15,000 and a secondary school, Faith Academy, a Youth Centre as well as Kingdom Heritage Model School (nursery and primary) which were all dedicated on Oct 2nd 2010. The auditorium is a replica of the Faith Tabernacle. Goshen is complete with a dual-carriage way running through the 740 acre facility with street lightning as well as a housing estate with over 45 housing units among others and all these were constructed in only 15 months. There are plans for a university to be built in Goshen. Goshen is now the Mission Headquarters of the Living faith Church. All over Nigeria and Africa, Winners Chapel has a lot of architectural masterpieces which emphasize utility. The use of pillars in her auditoriums is de-emphasized as this enables every worshipper to have visual access to the altar. Some of these masterpieces are Faith Tabernacle, Canaanland, Goshen, along km 26 Abuja-Keffi expressway, the old site of Winners Chapel in Durumi, Abuja, built in 6 months; Garden of Faith, Kaduna, Winners Chapel, Kano, Winners Chapel, Benue and Winners Chapel, Nairobi (Wonderland), Kenya to mention a few. Winners Chapel, Nairobi is the largest church auditorium in East and Central Africa and the auditorium sits 15,000.

Every December, Winners' Chapel holds its annual Prophetic gathering, called Shiloh. The annual Shiloh event and normal church services at the Faith Tabernacle can be viewed online real time.

There is a world of difference between wheat and weeds. We water and nurture wheat but we uproot and destroy weeds.

The Lord as sower sows good seeds in the lives of His children but Satan the enemy comes along in our unguarded moments, when we are asleep and are not observant and sows tares among the wheat (Matthew 13:24-30). In time the tares can take over the whole field and kill off the wheat.

It must be our decision and commitment to uproot EVERY tree that God our Father has not planted in our lives (Matthew 15:13).

It is not God that has planted inordinate and insatiable desire for sex in your life. It is not God that has planted a fanatical devotion to sexual perversion (prostitution, masturbation, homosexuality, etc.) in your life. It is not God that has planted excessive and uncontrollable anger, obnoxious behaviour that alienates people from you, unexplainable lack of progress despite honest and intelligent hard work, strange spiritual experiences that are debilitating yokes in your life.

Some of these you will need to break and uproot by repentance and righteousness (Daniel 4:27). Stubborn roots need dogged effort to uproot them.

Small weeds only need modest effort to uproot them. Established trees that are massive may need giant bulldozers to get to every strand of the root deep down in the soil and get them out. How rooted and massive are the demonic plantings in your life that need uprooting?

REALITY OF DEFINITE PLANTINGS

Matthew 15:13; 13:24-30,36-43; Galatians 6:7,8; Hosea 10:12; John 13:2,27; Acts 5:3,4; Proverbs 6:14; 16:28; 22:8; Hosea 8:7; Job 4:8.

Things that happen in our lives are not just coincidences. There are definite spiritual forces at work. Trees that exist in our lives have been planted. They have not just sprung up anyhow like weeds.

The planting can be negative or positive, beneficial or destructive depending on the nature of the planter.

Christ’s statement in Matthew 15:13 makes us to know that there are trees planted by God, some by ourselves, some by other people and yet others planted by Satan. Jesus told another parable to illustrate this very fact (Matthew 13:24-30,36-43).

In a local church, God plants the children of the kingdom to exalt the King and extend the kingdom. However Satan also plants his agents to destabilize and destroy (Matthew 13:24-30,36-43).

Who is the main planter in your life – God, self, others or Satan? The Lord planted profitable wheat in your soil (life), where are the useless weeds from?

Each person can plant (sow) things into his life (Galatians 6:7,8; Hosea 10:12). The seeds of destructive habits like laziness, indiscipline, indulgence, etc. that you sow today can become mighty trees in your life that sap your energy and negate every effort to progress. Be careful what you sow in your life!

Other people can also sow into our lives. Words of hatred, suspicion, etc. can be sown in our lives if we are not careful. This can lead to the collapse of strong and stable marriages, the ending of sweet friendships etc. (Proverbs 6:14; 16:28; 22:8; Hosea 8:7; Job 4:8).

The children of Israel allowed the unbelieving spies to sow seeds of doubt in their hearts. They had no room for the seeds of faith that Caleb and Joshua were prepared to sow. They lost their inheritance as a result (Numbers 13:30-33; 14:1-10).

Satan can sow bad thoughts in the mind (John 13:2,27; Acts 5:3,4). This is why it is important that we constantly renew our minds (Romans 12:1,2).

ROOTING UP DEMONIC PLANTINGS

Matthew 15:13; 13:24-30,36-43; 3:10; 7:19; Luke 3:9; Jeremiah 1:10; Psalm 37:35,36; 52:3-5; Exodus 14:13; Deuteronomy 29:28; 1 Kings 14:15; 2 Chronicles 7:20; 2 Corinthians 12:7.

“EVERY plant, which my heavenly Father hath not planted, shall be rooted up” (Matthew 15:13).

EVERY weed is to be uprooted. No place for weeds. No place for demonic plantings. Dag Hammarskjold said that the man who does not want weeds in his garden does not reserve a place for weeds.

Just like Jeremiah was appointed over the nations, you have been appointed over your life and family to root out every demonic planting, pull down every satanic stronghold, destroy every debilitating yoke in your life (Jeremiah 1:10; Isaiah 10:27; 2 Corinthians 10:3-5).

We need to clear the bush, uproot the weeds before we can begin to plant, otherwise the planting effort will be wasted (Jeremiah 1:10).

Those evil plantings in your life which you see today, you will see them no more because they will be totally uprooted and cast away (Psalm 37:35,36; 52:3-5; Exodus 14:13; Matthew 3:10; 7:19; Luke 3:9; Jude 12; Deuteronomy 29:28; 1 Kings 14:15; Proverbs 2:22; 2 Chronicles 7:20).

(1)   Evil personalities harassing and tormenting you shall be uprooted (Psalm 37:35,36).

When demons are cast out (expelled), it is like uprooting them from one soil and they will seek another soil to get rooted in (Matthew 12:43-45; Mark 5:1-15). Wicked people like witches, wizards, diabolical entities will be uprooted (Deuteronomy 29:28; 1 Kings 14:15; 2 Chronicles 7:20; Psalm 52:5; Proverbs 2:22; Jeremiah 1:10; Matthew 15:13).

Is there a messenger of Satan planted in your life that is buffeting and oppressing you? Every demonic planting will be uprooted (2 Corinthians 12:7).

(2)   Strange and terrifying experiences that are established in your life shall be uprooted.

Terrible nightmares, constant hallucinations, unnecessary fear, torment and terror, strange afflictions, unexplainable oppressions, sicknesses that have no organic roots are not the plantings of the Lord (Isaiah 54:14-17). Inability to sleep at night is not God’s doing for He giveth His beloved sweet sleep! (Psalm 127:2; Proverbs 3:24). All these experiences are plantings of the devil. They must be uprooted out of your personal experience.

(3)   Curses, spells, hexes, yokes that are blooming and prospering in your life like trees planted by the river side shall be uprooted (Isaiah 10:27; Jeremiah 1:10).

REVIVING THE DIVINE PLANTINGS

Jeremiah 1:10; Hosea 10:12; Psalm 126:5,6; 85:6; 1 Peter 1:23,25; Hebrews 12:12,13; Isaiah 40:29-31

No sensible farmer clears the bush and leaves it unplanted. If done it will soon be overgrown with weeds. When farmers are clearing the bush, sometimes they come across good trees that have had no opportunity to grow because of the surrounding weed. They spare such trees, fertilize them and begin to nurture them back to health.

As you root out demonic plantings, never leave any space for weeds in your life’s garden. Let the Lord plant new wheat and noble trees in their place. Where the roots of former divine plantings are still there, water them and let them shoot out and bloom. Revive the divine plantings in your life that are already dying out. Water that tree of vigilance, prayerfulness, bible reading habit, hunger for the word, passion for the Almighty, commitment to righteous living, love for christian fellowship, etc. These are great and noble trees that will bring forth profitable fruit that will bless your life.

Revive the spiritual sensitivity and gifts that are dying out in your life. Plant good habits in your life. Sow the seed of the incorruptible word in your heart (1 Peter 1:23,25). Sow to yourself in righteousness in order to reap in mercy (Hosea 10:12; Psalm 126:5,6).

Wait upon God to renew your strength, don’t faint. Revive those spiritual qualities that will ensure your victory (Isaiah 40:29-31).

Scientists say memory lapses can be blamed on too much irrelevant information and you need to de-clutter or spring-clean your mind. (Culled From The Daily Mail)

The experiments performed by Canadian researchers show that memory lapses that come with age are not simply due to the brain slowing down only but can also be blamed on the well-used brain finding it more and more difficult to stop irrelevant information interfering with the task in hand.

The first step in the study was to compare the working memory of the young and old volunteers.

In the context of the study:

The younger volunteers, who had an average age of 23, did better than the older ones, who had an average age of 67. (Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology)

Mervin Blair, of Montreal’s Concordia University stated that the older adults had more difficulty in getting rid of or suppressing previous and irrelevant information thus creating a loss of concentration and as a result prompting the need to de-clutter their mind.

While I’m a bit cautious about the statistics and research, this post will look at simple ways to de-clutter your mind and lists its benefits.

De-Cluttering

The Free Online Dictionary defines de-cluttering as an act of simplifying or getting rid of mess, disorder, complications…… that appear overwhelming.

Hans Hofmann (abstract expressionist painter) said ‘The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak’

Embarking on the concept of decluttering your mind opens up a whole new world towards achieving progress in your life.

Once again the aim of this post is to suggest simple ways of de-cluttering your mind and also analyse its benefits.

In no particular order they are as follows:

• Take a few deep breaths and calm down when tensed up.
• Learn to put some of your thoughts down on paper i.e. diaries, journal, notebooks…. You are able to come back to your ideas, tasks at a later time rather than clogging up your mind with so much information.
• Identify the important tasks, schedules, outstanding jobs… and prioritize them.
• Sleep peacefully and soundly. It’s important to have a good rest because you wake up feeling refreshed and mentally alert.
• Be creative on different issues going on in your mind.
• Go for a stroll in order to clear your head when you feel overwhelmed with so many things on your mind.
• Learn a language or musical instrument to keep the mind young.(American Medical Journal Of Neuropsychology)
• Do crossword puzzles to keep the brain active
• Socialize to keep the mind sharp
• Relax in the park, garden, by the seaside…. 
• It may be difficult but forgiving people who have hurt us makes us feel much better in the long run. 
• Learn to develop an attitude of gratitude.
• Read a good book.
• Engage in exercises because it increases your heart rate and allows oxygen to the brain which is good for boosting memory and de-cluttering your mind from daily trivia.
• Avoid being in a hurry if necessary because the chances are you would miss certain things because your mind is jumping from one place to another in a bid to complete tasks.
• Avoid being too hard on yourself because it creates undue pressure and anxiety
• Watch a good movie.
• Get a good massage. It helps to relax your nerves and muscle.
• Feel good about yourself. This helps to deal with negative thoughts on your self image.
• Organize your home, desk, bedroom…. ensuring things are put in the appropriate places. This isn’t suggesting you should become the cleaning police but seeing so much clutter around you has a way of occupying your mind.
• Take things one step at time. Finish one task before moving to another because it enhances productivity.
• Share your feelings with trusted friends, family, colleagues….. It makes sense to get things off your chest because you feel much lighter after doing so.
• This may be slightly controversial but when necessary; cry a bit, shout in moderation in order to feel relieved.
• Engage in constructive and positive affirmations. This creates and boosts optimistic thoughts.
• Learn to say No!!! Don’t take on more than you can handle because you would be under a lot of pressure to keep to your commitments.

Benefits Of De-Cluttering Your Mind.

The benefits of de-cluttering your mind are as follows:

Your life gets simplified as a result.

You tend to reduce your stress levels.

You’ve got more time to spend on important things such as hobbies, family, growing a business…..(generally speaking doing things you’d want to do) as a result of de-cluttering your mind.

You are able to control your spending habits because most of the time you won’t spend on impulse due to planned lists generated

You are able to make careful considerations before making commitments because you are not under so much pressure to do so.

You are able to relax better and have peace of mind.

You are able to live in the present.

Your Turn

What are the ways in which you de-clutter your mind?

It would be great to have your comments and suggestions.

The pomp and ceremony that marked the celebration of Nigeria @ 50 can better be appreciated against the backdrop of the heuristic formative process of the Nigerian state.

It is a historic fact that what is today glibly referred to as the most populous black nation of the world is a by-product of the western imperialist interest.

It all began in 1849, when the British colonial authorities stormed the west coast of Africa in furtherance of their economic and strategic interests.

The first major step was the creation of a Consulate for the Bight of Biafra and the Bight of Benin, as part of efforts to sanitize them from the ‘stain’ of the slave trade. This measure sparked off a chain reaction that led to a deeper involvement of the colonial master in the economic and political life of the people of the two Bights.

The intrusion of the white man was however not smooth-sailing as he met stiff resistance among the natives. There was also bitter rivalry between the British and the French that resulted in the partitioning of the coastal area.

With time, the Consulate of the Bights of Biafra and Benin, as well as its immediate hinterland, was converted into the oil protectorate; and later, in 1893, transformed into the Niger Coast Protectorate. By the middle of the 20th century, this protectorate came to be known as Eastern Nigeria.

In 1862, the British annexed the Lagos Lagoon area and its environs, converting them into a ‘crown colony’. This, according to them, was to abolish slave trade which used the area as export point.

Nigerian historians however unmasked their real intention which was to be better able to protect their interest in the vital trade route that ran from Lagos, through Ikorodu, Ibadan all the way to the Niger waterway in the north and beyond.

As the imperial irredentist moves continued, the rest of the Yorubaland was conquered and attached to Lagos in 1897. This flank became known as Western Nigeria in the 1950s.

The third and final step came in 1888, when the British changed the National African Company to Royal Niger Company after its trade conquest in the Lower Niger. The Royal Niger Company became chartered and  acquired political and administrative powers over a narrow belt of territory on both sides of the river, from the sea to Lokoja, as well as over the vast area which in the 20th century, came to be known as Northern Nigeria.

The birth of Nigeria is, in the main, a story of how these three neighbouring but distinct entities were forcibly brought together, first administratively; and later, politically.

It is instructive to note that even after the amalgamation of 1914; the colonial master deliberately ensured that the three territories never intermeshed. As it has been remarked elsewhere, the amalgamation was a colossal administrative hoodwink as it existed mainly on paper and in the person of Lord Frederick Lugard, rather than in an interlocking bureaucracy and political system.

Lugard refused to create a central secretariat for two reasons: the fear of having his power attenuated; and the need to shield the Northern Protectorate from the blizzard of westernization sweeping through the Southern Protectorate.

The upshot was that the amalgamation did not bring about a central bureaucracy. Besides, Lugard made sure that contact between the technical departments of the north and the south was kept at the barest minimum.

After 1914, Lugard created a body known as the Nigerian Council which met once a year to listen to his address on the state of the Colony and Protectorate of Nigeria. The body had no legislative powers whatsoever.

The ambivalence of the colonial master in keeping Nigeria politically divided was more evident in the Clifford Constitution of 1922.Though that constitution introduced the elective principle for legislative houses, the Legislative Council which replaced Lugard’s Nigerian Council made laws for only the South while the Governor legislated for the North through proclamations.

The first major step towards the political integration of the country was taken in 1946. The constitution promulgated that year by the then Governor General, Sir Arthur Richards, had as its objectives the promotion of the unity of Nigeria and granting of greater participation to Nigerians in discussing their affairs.

Major provisions of this constitution included the establishment of a re-constituted Legislative Council whose competence covered the whole country; the abolition of the official majority in the council; the creation of regional councils consisting of a House of Assembly in each of the Northern, Eastern and Western provinces, and the creation of House of Chiefs in the North whose roles were purely advisory rather than legislative.

Nevertheless, whatever was the gain of the Richards Constitution of 1946 was whittled down by the Lyttleton Constitution of 1954, which established a lopsided federation in which one region, the North, was larger than the other two regions - East and West - put together.

Thus, at independence in 1960, the Nigerian state was characterized by weak constitutional and institutional bases for development politics; an unbalanced federation; regionalism which engendered mutual fear and distrust; as well as regionally- based political constituencies.

The divergent tendencies of the multifarious ethnic  groupings in the country prior to independence was such that the leader of the defunct Northern Peoples Congress, NPC, Sir Ahmadu Bello, was constrained to remark that: “Since 1914, the British Government has been trying to make Nigeria into one country, but the Nigerian people themselves are historically different in their backgrounds, in their religious beliefs and their customs, and do not show themselves any sign of willingness to unite….

“Nigerian unity is only a British intention for the country. Many Nigerians deceive themselves by thinking that Nigeria is one…. This is wrong. I am sorry to say that this presence of unity is artificial and it ends outside this chamber.”(Coleman, 1964).

In the same vein, the leader of the defunct Action Group, Chief Obafemi Awolowo, observed that: “Nigeria is not a nation. It is a mere geographical expression. There are no ‘Nigerians’ in the same sense as there are ‘English’, Welsh’ or ‘French’. The word ‘Nigerian’ is an appellation to distinguish those who live within the boundaries of Nigeria from those who do not” (Coleman, 1964).

The politics of the First Republic was played on regional basis, with the National Council of Nigerian Citizens led by Dr. Nnamdi Azikiwe holding sway in the East;  the Obafemi Awolowo-led Action Group controlling the West; while the Northern Peoples Congress led by Sir Ahmadu Bello took charge in the North.

The wobbly tripod on which the unity of the country was anchored almost collapsed in 1966 following the first military intervention in the nation’s politics. With ethnic bias read into the execution of the coup, and a counter coup by the northern elements in the military, a major national crisis ensued. First, the North threatened to pull out of the union in 1966. When General Yakubu Gowon took over the reins of power, he alluded to this fact. In his maiden broadcast on the 2nd of August 1966, the General remarked that “putting all considerations to test –political, economic as well as social – the basis for unity is not there”.

The following year, 1967, the East practically pulled out of the federation and declared its autonomy as the Republic of Biafra. It took 30 months of gory civil war to whip them back to line.

Indeed, a purposeful and determined approach towards forging a real national integration never began until after the civil war. It is therefore right to say that the over two million casualties of that war are the real martyrs of the Nigerian nationhood as their blood has sealed the county’s covenant of unity in diversity.

Worthy of acknowledgement is the ‘No Victor, No Vanquished’ policy of the Federal Government at the end of the war, driven by the triple programmes of Rehabilitation, Reconstruction and Reconciliation.

Since then, successive administrations at the centre have come up with many policies and programmes aimed at consolidating the nation’s bond of unity. Notable among them are the introduction of the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) Scheme; creation of states and local governments; the relocation of the federal capital to a more central area; and the establishment of the Federal Character Commission.

As the country clocks 50 as an independent nation-state, one national question that seems to have been settled for good is the indissolubility of the federation. Both those who desire it and those who do not are unprepared to pay the costly price of attempting to break up the nation. It was principally for this reason that the country survived the unpopular annulment of the results of the June 12, 1993 presidential election and the controversial enforcement of the Sharia legal code by some northern states early in this millennium.

It is therefore incontrovertible that Nigeria at 50 has attained the status of nationhood. It is essentially fit that Nigerians rolled out drums to celebrate on the 1st of October this year at the golden jubilee of the nation’s independence.

Indeed, the unity the country achieved in the past 50 years is certainly not attributable to the ‘Lugardian’ amalgamation. It is rather a product of the supreme sacrifice made by millions of Nigerians that the country may be one.
The war against balkanization having been won, what is to be addressed now is the issue of harmonious co-existence of the federating units and individual citizens, based on equity and justice, without which the nation can never prosper

From the moment of conception, parenting is demanding, exhausting, ennobling. It brings out the best in every being; it highlights the worst. It is the love for the child that makes both parents strong as well as vulnerable.

Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social and intellectual developments of a child from infancy to adulthood. It entails providing safety, shelter, clothes, nourishment, protection and physical development by introducing the child to exercise thereby inculcating good health habits in him.

On intellectual security, the parents also provide the conditions in which a child’s mind can develop thus providing an atmosphere of peace, justice, respect to one’s dignity, an environment without fear, threat and abuse.
It is also a parental task to support and provide school related learning, teach social skills and etiquette and give moral and spiritual development, as well as creating ethical value systems with social norms that contribute to the child’s beliefs, culture, and customs.

On emotional security, parents help protect the child’s psyche by providing a safe environment which guarantees love and acceptance, giving emotional support and encouragement by caressing, hugging, touching, etc. Parents also have the task of developing the child’s ability to love, care, and help others by showing empathy and compassion. Parents ought to provide good space for the child to play which helps with physical, emotional and intellectual development.

It is also part of the task of the parents to bring up a child with the religious principles especially through exemplary lifestyle. Since every child has positive and negative qualities, parents are expected to help develop the positive and “weed out” or “prune” the negative. Children’s talents are developed through organized leisure activities, thereby challenging their children to think critically and to speak properly and frequently especially with the adults.

Traditionally, parents had enough time to take care of their child in an atmosphere of love, concern, care, structure and peace but we don’t live in an ideal society anymore because our society has developed to the point where if the family is going to obtain the things it needs, then both will have to work to be able to meet up.

Traditionally, parents in times past, spent more time with their child but in the present age the reverse is the case. This lack of care by parents is really telling on the society in that it is not difficult to see who are not well behaved. They exhibit such acts as dropping out of school, armed robbery, kidnapping, militancy, prostitution and teenage pregnancy among others. Working parents always grapple over issues of fairness when it comes to child care. It is never easy for full time working parents to give all it would take to keep the family running smoothly.

Child rearing is complicated, no doubt. Parents struggle with what to do with their children when they return home from school.

The challenge of getting ready early in the morning leads to unhealthy breakfast choices or worse, none at all for parents. They have lots on their minds about their child’s welfare. Working parents no longer have time to bring up their child morally and they leave their child at the mercy of Day-Care-Services or house helps.

Parenting is a high stake venture. The ruin of a child often begins when parents ignore a young toddler’s disobedient look or rebellious words because it is inconvenient to administer correction.

Parents should be able to provide a conducive environment free from fighting/quarrelling in the presence of the children. Parents should create time out of their working tight schedule to spend with their children, check their school books and assist with their homework, take time to visit their school to find out how they are faring. Working parents should be careful not to take stress out on their children. 

They may not understand why you are stressed, but they can sense your moods. Be aware that many children especially teenagers are under stress too. So working parents should plan time to talk with their kids. Ask them about school and any problems they are having. And make sure they have plenty of time for just being with other kids and having fun. Check out who their friends are.

On the society, there is a proverb that says that “A child is not owned by one person”. With the above it could be seen that a child is owned by the society so one cannot see a child going astray and let him because if one lets a child go a wrong way and the child turns out a bad fellow in future, it all falls on the society. So the society on its part plays a big role in the upbringing of a child.

Finally, as a parent, you are responsible for correcting and guiding your kid in line with the popular saying that “We should train a child he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it”.

Introduction

This paper will examine the role of women in healthcare service and policy-making bodies pertaining to health service institutions. Attempt will also be made to identify the constraints and their possible solutions.

Abstract

Because women represent the nucleus of the community in Nigeria, programs and successful health activities depend on them. Also because women represent half of Nigeria’s population and because health is family-centered affairs, the crucial role of health care for the society lies on their shoulders.

Like other parts of Africa, Nigeria is patriarchal in nature. Traditional, the Nigerian society has allocated the role of nurturing, and ensuring the health of the family and the community as a whole to women. From the ages of six, girls begin to work with their mothers; cleaning, sweeping and caring for the younger children, the aged and the sick. Therefore, the female child is customarily socialized as the custodian of family health. Because women are traditionally responsible for health in Africa countries and their status in society is low, the status of the health sector has received less attention than other sectors.

“Health is wealth,” unfortunately, not much recognition is given to the fact that the health of the Nigerian woman is the qualification for the creation of national wealth. Generally speaking, the health standard of Nigerians is very low, that of women is dreadful and characterized by such indicators as high maternal mortality rate, low life expectancy, high morbidity rate, low access to health facilities and ignorance of any modern method of family planning by more than 50 percent of women of reproductive age while sexual abuse and prostitution are on the increase among women.

The Involvement of Women in health policy development and Decision Making in Nigeria.

Women represent a reasonable percentage of the Nigerian population and in fact in many of the thirty six (36) states of Nigeria they now exceed more than half of the population of the states. Due to the educational opportunities and experiences attained by women they are increasing and getting involved in health policy and decision-making.

Decisions and policies are usually the results of the way a system is organized. Women help hospitals and many other kinds of health institutions, formulate and implement policies that seek to help make health care service available and affordable to everyone.

In health care issues, because of their interest and direct involvement at the family level, women are able to make decisions that are as good as those made by men. In fact a study has shown evidences that, most Nigerians believe that women are making and implementing better decisions in the health sectors than men (e.g. Dora Akunyili in NAFDAC).

The policies to expand health care service, to introduce health insurance coverage and prioritizing health facilities in states and local government in Nigeria were most initiated and pushed by women during their tenures as ministers, permanent secretaries, Director of teaching hospitals etc.

Women As Agents of Primary Health care

Women are the main agents of primary health care, they play essential role in maintaining family and community health. They are the ones who are most aware of sickness and suffering in the community because of their social role as nurtures and caretakers of the young, the old, the sick and the handicapped, and they exert an important influence on health habits in the family.

Women as Implementer of Health care Activities

Women are mostly responsible for the most of the implementation steps of a health care process in the Nigerian society. The majority of health problems does not reach the medical care system, but are dealt with informally by women, whoa act as wife, mother or adult daughter.

At the beginning of all health care program (including the well known Expanded Program on Immunization) women played a big role to enrich the program through suggesting useful and practical ideas. They have been responsible for the formation of health- related (most) community associations.

Because of their having the advantage of easily visiting homes, women have been in the forefront for most health care awareness campaigns. They are able to ask private questions that men cannot ask, thus in profiling solutions to health problems of communities, they are able to observe directly, unlike men who collect required information by asking the inhabitants. In local authorities such Local Government Health Department, Health Centers and Ministries, women have helped in preparing monitoring plan of action for health projects, because they belong to the communities and are more familiar with their community problems.

Through their involvement in NGOs, women have helped in schools, institutes and universities; studies have shown that they are the best messengers of the environmental health messages, which have been ensuring the desire behaviors across Nigeria.

In their positions as mothers, teachers, employees, housewives, health workers, social workers, nurses etc. have played important roles towards forming healthy behaviors and propagating basic health knowledge. Many programs of reinforcing or refreshing knowledge and skills such as training of trainers, women have been the vanguard, because of their capability to raise awareness among women and children (which form the large segment of the Nigerian population) more easily.

In most Nigerian communities, to sensitize community members, visiting the inhabitants and assessing their health situations, women are always involved in order to encourage and motivate the inhabitants. Also women have been participating in health communication activities, by implementing team /group discussions, and cooperating in seminars and conferences.

Being known as women has in the past led to effective rising of awareness, causing changing behaviors, improving practice and attitude towards health behavior issues such as dangerous sexual practices, drinking of alcohol smoking and solid waste management.

Women have played important role in income-generating related environmental issues, in such a manner, they identify the community needs and mobilize the housewives to help their family situation and improving their lifestyle through inviting them to participate in training workshops about health issues.

Constraints

1. The paradox of entrusting the woman with the responsibility of health and at the same time denying her the opportunities to influence policies remains a major obstacle.
2. Education is another factor that affects adversely the role of women in Nigeria. Access to education for Nigerian women is a major problem. The impact of poorly educated mother is passed on to the daughter.

Possible Solutions

In order for communities to benefit from the knowledge which women posses, a renewed self-confidence of women has to be encouraged. Women have to learn to regard themselves as capable human beings with important contributions to make on the basis of their life experience and their accumulated wealth of knowledge. Also, a conscious effort has to be made to enable women to organized and to vocalize the information they have acquired.

More women must be made to penetrate all levels and all areas of the health care system. They have to be doctors, nurses, community development agents, educators, agricultural extension workers, public health officials, planners, legislators, and politicians. At the same time, they have to encourage the participation of people at the grass-root, including women and women organizations, in the decisions affecting individuals and community health.

Special efforts must be made to organize education, vocational and professional training in such a way that more girls and women can take advantage of them. Make more investment in primary health care programs which includes health education and the application of health promoting activities based on simple but scientifically sound measures in which women can participate at local level, is likely to provide more benefits than traditional efforts dedicated to the formation of highly skilled physicians who practice medicine in clinics and hospitals.

INTRODUCTION

Nurses, according to the International Council of Nurses (ICN) Code of Ethics as reviewed in 2005, have four fundamental responsibilities: to promote health, to prevent illness, to restore health and to alleviate suffering. The need for nursing is universal. Inherent in nursing is respect for human rights, including cultural rights, the right to life and choice, to dignity and to be treated with respect. Nursing care is respectful of and unrestricted by considerations of age, color, creed, culture, disability or illness, gender, sexual orientation, nationality, politics, race or social status. Nurses render health services to the individual, the family and the community and coordinate their services with those of related groups.

The detailed history of a profession that combines scientific principles, technical skills and personal comparison can’t be precisely relayed but records hold that Nursing came to limelight in 1854 when the Mother of Professional Nursing, Florence Nightingale started the battlefield with other 38 nurses and cared for the sick and injured men during the Crimean war in England. Her persistence dedicated service, day & night, experiences paid off by making her famous and recognized by lady with the lamp. Her metric service resulted in complete change in Nursing profession and lead to the beginning of professional nursing.

Though, Nursing in the early days was primarily a family matter with mothers caring for their own families or neighbors assisting each other.

In 1880, the status of Nursing was greatly improved and many women including religious orders were now involved in patient care. During the era, there are many school of nursing for trained nurses throughout Europe with the first school established in 1836 by Parker Theoder Fliedner in his parish in Kavesworth Germany through the influence of Florence Nightingale the kareworth school.

In 1882, came the first movement for the recognition and registration of nurses. International body were formed emigrate Royal British Nurses Council of Nurses established in 1893 and international council of nurses was established with headquarters in Geneva, Switzerland and branches all over the world. Also, in 1926, the British College of Nurses was founded. The first African-American graduate nurse, Mary E. Mahoney, who promoted integration & better working condition, for black patients and healthcare workers.

HISTORY OF NURSING NIGERIA

Though, nursing came to Nigeria through the British Colonial masters. They provided services and medical care for wounded soldiers at the furtherworth Hospital. Later the first nursing home in Nigeria in Jericho, Ibadan by the government of the British Colonial masters.

Later on missionaries and their wives came to supplement government effort by setting up Mission homes, Dispensaries e.t.c. and commence the training of Nurses in Nigeria, though language barrier there was no formal training but on the Job acquisition skills and practical aspect are been rendered by nursing surgery.

The regional government in Nigeria began the training of Nurses by settings individual regional standard. In 1949, the School of Nursing, Eleyele was established to facilitate the training of nurses, later in 1952, the University College Hospital Ibadan started the training of nurses in a higher standard. In 1949, the Nursing Council of Nigeria was established to complement the efforts of the various training bodies and creating standards for Nurses.

By 1965, a department of Nursing was established in the University of Ibadan to commence a degree programme in Nigeria. Later on, University of Ife and University of Nigeria, Enugu also started degree in 1973. At present all the states on Nigeria has one or more School of Nursing, Midwifery and kinds of Post Basic schools. More degree awarding institutions has been granted the license to produce degree holder in Nursing. Among them are Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria; University of Calabar, Calabar; Ladoke Akintola University (LAUTECH), Ogbomoso. Also private University, Babcock University, disan Remo; Leadcity University; Madonna University among others started degree in Nursing.

Before 1981, nursing was adjudged a vocation in Nigeria, but by virtue of the Industrial Arbitration Panel (IAP) award of 1981, nursing got the recognition of a full-fledged profession.

CHALLENGES FACING NURSING PRACTICE IN NIGERIA

“To stand still is to move backwards”. This statement is true of life’s existence where man aspires to grow, develop progress, invent, and initiate actions that would bring about changes. For without changes, there would be no progress. Nursing has over the decades, gone through changes. As time and situations change so has nursing, thereby bringing about challenges facing the practice of nursing even in Nigeria.

The greatest challenge to nursing practice in Nigeria is the nurse herself. Nurses in contemporary Nigeria are less caring, committed and dedicated to meeting the needs of clients. Most nurses are resistant to change, professional development and advancement. In nursing practice and education, some nurses tend to hold onto previous knowledge and skills without making efforts to improve and maintain new skills. Many nurses are not willing to accept the challenges of staying abreast with education and development of new skills in their areas and levels of nursing practice. Similarly, the natural qualities expected to be found in nurses (punctuality, selfless service, among others) is virtually absent these days. This has serious implication for nursing practice. Many nurses just practice for practicing sake, they do not see the intricacies of nursing as a care from nurse professionals, rather they are committed to other issues of life than nursing care practice. Many practice only for financial benefit not because nursing is a calling for them. Student nurses are also victims of this situation.

Related to this is education; an essential element in all treatment activities and a means of keeping current or progressing aimed at developing individuals who are open to change. Regrettably, a large percentage of nurses are not open to change. This can be stretched into the training of both student nurses and professional nurses creating an environment where there are no checks and control, i.e. failure to abide by rules and regulations, leading to a crop of poorly trained nurses. Undue favour to some nurses in training by trainers of nurses which is commonplace in the society is an additional challenge. This has direct implication for the nursing care provided by such half-baked nurses. In fact, they become dangerous to patients, society and themselves. The hitherto unqualified educational standard of the basic nursing certificate is also a challenge. Nurses continue to practice in most hospitals without re-orientation to the needs of patients in the 21st century. Non attendance of clinical care workshops by nurses and non organization of seminar/workshop on clinical nursing issues are all inherent problems in many Nigerian hospitals. This in turn affects nurses’ remuneration which is another obvious concern for nursing practice.

Secondly, the advancement in science and technology will continue to affect the nursing profession. In the past, nurses relied on their experiences, observation and intuition but today, nursing has a defined body of knowledge specific to the profession and continues to develop this knowledge through research and practice as they relate to new drugs, methods of delivery, disease control and prevention through sterilization and disinfection of equipment, and models in nursing, among others. For instance, the knowledge and implementation of the nursing process as a scientific and systematic approach to nursing care has been seen by many nurses as problematic. Some nurses have found it difficult to implement it because some professionals in the health system do not quite understand what it is about. In addition, some nurses have attached a lot of constraints such as shortage of staff and lack of stationery as reasons hindering the implementation of the nursing process which is a tool for improved nursing care. The changing role of the nurse requires continued competence. Many nurses are unable to maintain a high level of individual competence in nursing practice, skill and knowledge, recognizing and accepting responsibilities for individual action and judgment.

Thirdly, a major challenge to nursing practice is policy making on health issues. Most nurses are women and therefore the position of nurses in Nigeria and the value given to nurses’ work are aligned with their position in the society. The nurses of the past were grossly handicapped because of the type of training they received. They were maids and took this feminine submissive roles without questioning, after all, the “Husband is the Head of the Home”. Nurses have traditionally been subordinate to physicians and these have perhaps affected their leadership roles in policy making on health issues. Nursing today is practiced in the midst of other health needs competing for the scarce resources allotted to health. The poor representation and participation of nurses in decision making on health matters will not move nursing forward. This situation must change if our wonderful dreams about the future of nursing must be fulfilled.

According to WHO at the World Health Assembly in May 2004 (ICN, 2004), some advanced countries have approximately 1000 nurses per 100,000 population while many developing countries, including Nigeria, have 10 nurses per 100,000 population or even less. Registered nurses are leaving Nigeria either for family reasons or for greener pastures giving the advanced countries chances to gain while Nigeria stands to loss through this brain drain. The shortage of nurses in rural areas is particularly another constraint. In Nigeria, nurses posted to rural areas feel that they have been forgotten. Many a time, such nurses perform far below expectation. Furthermore, the nursing profession aims at providing quality nursing care by providing a scientific base for the practice of nursing. Thus the need for research has become necessary. Unfortunately, only very few nurses are interested in research even though it is the responsibility of all nurses to do research to improve nursing care. The introduction of Research Methodology as a course in Schools of Nursing has done little for now to make students attach much importance to research projects as most students believe that research ends after school.

It must also be pointed out that some work environment are un-conducive and non –supportive for nursing practice as they lack sufficient facilities and equipment to work with. They also lack sufficient motivational input such as housing, transportation, incompetent supervision, poor working relationship, general moral laxity in the society, undue familiarity with the subordinates with a weakness in disciplining erring staff, among others. Nurses are no longer in control of the immediate environment in which patients are nursed. If quality health care must be provided, then we have to look critically into some of these problems of the physical, social and mental environments.

We must not forget that despite the increasing number of infections, many Nigerians still very much patronize traditional healers and traditional birth attendants especially now that they have to pay for the health service they receive. Even if they come to the hospital acutely ill, they leave much sooner than they did in the past there by increasing the demand on nurses to ensure high quality, comprehensive care before discharge. These challenges indeed have a lot of effects, among which are relapses and complications which are they further challenges to nursing. These have affected nursing care to clients, families and the community at large; many nurses are unable to set priorities for care and assist client in meeting their needs in the most time- and cost-effective manner possible, while ensuring excellence in client care.

Additionally, most government policies do not focus on meeting the needs of the profession because nurses do not fully participate in policy making. Nevertheless, nurses occupy a central position in the health care delivery system. The shortage of nurses in Nigeria and lack of sufficient facilities and equipment to work with are not just a “problem of nursing” but a health system problem which undermines health system effectiveness. Also, unavailability or lack of proper planning and budgeting due to non involvement of nurses and many nurse leaders in management’s budgetary meetings. Poor knowledge of nurse leaders’ knowledge about politics and the influence of nursing administration on general hospital administration/management.

Often, Nigerian nurses, instead of asking for the right equipment and materials for nursing care services, they seldom go on industrial action because of lack of equipment for nursing clinical works rather they continue to improvise to the detriment of their professional practice.

Another major problem in the nursing sector is the fact that most nurse leaders lack experience and they retire away quickly as soon as they enter into nursing administrative arena because of age on entry and number of years in service. The experienced nurses are not also available in the clinical settings to render service rather they are kept in offices away from their patients and fellow nurses that need to learn from their past clinical experiences. They seek office allocation, good chair to seat on as soon as they have been promoted to higher ranks; this they claim is to show the level of their status instead of good clinical practice to be shown for the status. And this has brought the idea of nurses migrating at alarming rate out of the country to seek greener pastures. Some experienced nurses also hide under the canopy of poor health not to render service yet they remain as leaders. All these are copied by the junior nurses and nurses in training and subsequently as soon as nurses become registered they form the association of nurses that seat round the table or in offices in different wards with their bags full of items that are on sale and latest materials in town (cloth and jewelries).

Inter/intra professional rivalry is a major contributing factor hindering the ‘successes’ of the career. Nurses not seeing themselves as the strongest pillar in health field, rather they practice other professions that are none nursing in order to seek personal/societal recognition. Most times many nursing independent activities are left undone the interdependent activities are done with much commitment. Bed bath, Bed pan round, monitoring of vital signs and patient care reporting are fast leaving hospital setting. The relatives are made to carry Bed pans, Doctors to see patient alone on wards/clinics, and do patients’ vital signs themselves while in clinics, caterers also have to book meals for the patients themselves without the nurses’ participation. Nurses claiming to be too busy to perform these activities and making them to be less important activities of nurses.

SOLUTIONS TO THE PROBLEMS OF NURSES

The solutions to these challenges lie in nurses’ hands and in those of policy makers. It is the responsibility of all to join hands to provide adequate funds for regular in-service training and seminars to update nurses knowledge and skills, provide funds to improve existing health institutions and modern equipment, continually focus on delivery of care that is safe, comprehensive and effective, appropriation of funds by the government to Departments/Schools of Nursing for scholarship for nursing students in order to attract more people into the nursing profession, as well as help those already in the profession to have higher education without much financial burden. A blueprint targeted at quickly situating all nursing education programmes in higher institutions will greatly enhance the educational image of the profession and consequently improve remunerations. Nurse researchers should continue to develop and refine nursing knowledge and practice through the investigation of nursing problems. Mentorship in nursing should as well be encouraged.

Continuous training and development that leads to good leadership and better skills in nursing care services should be encouraged; and this will in turn promote the image of the nurse in the society. The status of nursing in our society has not promoted good professional image, for the nurses largely because of poor facilities in the training institutions and lack of commitment to practical teaching on the ward by all cadres of nurses. Nurses leaving professional care to student nurses or pupil midwives Nurses must practice to show the learners how to do it, nursing professional training is hospital based. All cadres of nurses must be committed to this apart from clinical instructors.

The nurses need to learn to regulate their own services not leaving it for others to decide upon, by extension, there is a need to professionalized the career, nurses in Nigeria should fully operates within the ambit of a code of professional conduct for Nurses as put together by the Nursing and Midwifery Council of Nigeria like making it possible for nurses with first degree to practice along with those with Diploma trainings. This is supposed to be strength for nursing care in Nigeria. If intra professional rivalry is removed nurses would learn from each other and subsequently nursing care would be improved in this century. Nurses at leadership position should consult their learned and experienced fellows nationally and internationally to be able to acquire both theoretical experience and practical skill needed for improved services. Consultation now made easy with computerization. E-mailing each other on ideas about care in hospital settings that are more advanced than ours. Use of internet facilities to improve nursing care in Nigeria. Nurses need to read newspapers, journals and internet articles to be more informed about current issues in Nursing Services.

As nurse leaders we must not confine ourselves to nursing alone we must read wide, socialize well and work as assertive individuals to promote our image and the image of nursing profession in Nigeria. We must be seen to be here and there in health services and must contribute maximally in our areas of interest or specialization in care apart from administrative skill used in office as Nurse Administrators. Nursing informatics are essential for application of computer into nursing care, lack of knowledge in this area can cause declining care as nurses will fail to utilize computer technology to the advantages of clinical nursing care recipients.

Nurses should also imbibe the following simple steps as part of their profession;

·        Show other persons that you listen and understand the situation/problem.

·        Say what you think or feel

·        Suggest what you want to happen

·        Ensure that you do not manipulate unnecessarily

·        Say things honestly and be self confident.

And they should put-off and shun common types of behavior among theirselves that can be contributory to declining services; such behavior includes passive or lazee fair attitude, aggressive or autocratic behavior, assertive behavior etc. By assertiveness, over confidence should be avoided.

Entry level into nursing permits aspiration to top level in the career structure, not running from clinical setting to school of nursing to teach. Clinical setting requires nurse clinicians for appropriate rivalry inter professionally in the health care setting. Nurses are to teach themselves as well, as the public, these days the public is well informed, they need informed nurses too. In all these areas senior nurses or nurse leaders may be copied positively or negatively by the junior ones or nurses in training. It is necessary for nurse leaders to serve as good example by practicing appropriately having appropriate, education and ensuring same by others. Adequate dressing promotes the image of nursing so also is the professional rivalry

There is also a need to review procedure manual nationally and steps in the procedures should be implemented appropriately in all hospitals. This would always improve the quality of care rendered by nurses. Quality assurance units must be established to ensure auditing of nursing services. Nurses need to be closely monitored to ensure quality care and accountability.

Nurses should most times give room for negotiation to press home their demands. It has been discovered that embarking on industrial strike paralyze a lots of activities in the sector, and this bring about the death of many in the society.

Finally, I must stress that the nursing profession must remain dynamic in its attempt to meet health care needs of the society. In an address by His Excellency, Chief Olusegun Obasanjo, ex- president of the Federal Republic of Nigeria at the West African College of Nursing Conference on the Theme: Reforms in Nursing Practice in the 21^st center Abuja, March 2005, stated that “the 21^st century nurse should be one that is equipped not only with the basic requisite knowledge and skill to function in the clinical aspect of health care provision, but must also possess the requisite knowledge and skill to function as a team leader, manager of resources, counselors and advocate to patients”. With this in mind, let us strive to make nursing practice in Nigeria, a supportive profession that is interested in meeting the health care needs of its people. There is also a need for nursing to fashion out its own philosophy in the light of this present challenges to quality nursing practice and high level of professionalism. This includes all nurses, irrespective of their qualifications, to come out and speak with one voice. There should also be proper periodic education to sensitize them on the changes in the socio-cultural environment, the increase and growing sense of their responsibilities to recipients of care, the new clientele in the health industry/new concept of man and her relationship to the world around him, the rise in literacy level/ advances in medical science and technology, the complexity of knowledge and skills required to give safe and hazard free nursing care to consumers of healthcare services, the greater awareness of individual’s rights and obligations of human worth of dignity among other things

SUMMARY AND CONCLUSION

Nursing clinical services in Nigeria is a challenge to all nursing leaders. The problem causing the declining clinical practice is enormous but all are challenging. Some are as identified in this paper solution to them all, are removal of all professional rivalries, continuous education, good adaptation to ones profession, commitment of all leaders to good professional image and practical nursing services in hospital settings. Politics and administration also are instrument for use by leaders to move nursing care forward not for personal gain only. Self-centeredness should be replaced with adage such as nursing profession is our own. Nursing is a noble profession.
Nursing profession keeps growing in the 21st century ours as leaders is to ensure the growth in our own country by promoting good education of our subordinates, making ourselves good examples and ambassadors of the noble profession “nursing”. Nursing is in the hand of nurses, lack of basic equipment and appropriate technology is a problem in our hands. Solution will be appropriate budgeting, planning and implementation of our plan. Loyalty and commitment are also essential.

The paper has been able to just make a brief discussion on the issue of declining nursing care in Nigeria and proffer some solution just to keep nurse leaders abreast of the issue and to challenge nurse leaders to move ahead with the instrument of administration in their hand. Professional regulation and individual clinical judgment in practice could add beauty to nursing professional practice in Nigeria. The nursing care recipients are our people, they deserve the best (SERVICOM).

It is also necessary to do research, so as to give evidence base practice. Utilization of the research findings by nurse leaders are also essential. Betty Ackley et al are working hard to ensure evidence based practice in USA, Nurses in Nigeria can be part of their work to ensure evidence based practice in Nigeria.

Nurse leaders must all be available to study and to service. Declining nursing services as a language must be removed from Nigerian nurses dictionary when Nigerian nurses are internationally acclaimed nurse professionals.

REFERENCES

·      Leadership trainings that would benefit nursing clinical services improvement centre round. Advanced nursing training course, at Post Basic and Masters Degree level (Joyce 2001).

·      Specialized education of family nurse practitioners who will function at all levels of care also is a desirable goal to provide holistic health care for Nigeria family. (Irionoye, Ogunfowokan and Olaogun 2006).

·      International literature identified that any change to the nurses role in health assessment skills, requires strategies that involve the regulatory, educational and practice components of nursing. Teaching physical assessment skills to nurses within a holistic health model would improve nursing care services. (Lesa and Dixon 2007)

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·      Encarta Library ref. (2004).

·      FMOH (2004) Nigeria’s Health Sector reforms.

·      50 years of oil, “Nigeria, how are you”. Hospital mail Vol.1/12-896 lxy. Lagos Nigeria.

“To stand still is to move backwards”. This statement is true of life’s existence where man aspires to grow, develop progress, invent, and initiate actions that would bring about changes. For without changes, there would be no progress. Nursing has over the decades, gone through changes. As time and situations change so has nursing, thereby bringing about challenges facing the practice of nursing even in Nigeria.

However, before this detailed discussion, the definitions of the following terms are relevant. Challenge is defined by Oxford Advanced Learner’ Dictionary as “A new or difficult task that tests somebody’s ability and skill”. Nursing practice is a dynamic, caring and helping relationship in which the nurse assists the client and society to achieve and maintain optimal health. Amidst various definitions, Nursing was defined by Virginia Henderson as “A learned humanistic and scientific discipline whereby a nurse assist the patient, sick or well in the performance of those activities contributing to his/her recovery or to a peaceful death that he or she would have performed unaided if he had the necessary strength will or knowledge and to do those things in such a way to help him or her gain independence as rapidly as possible”.

Having defined the basic concepts, I will in this essay address the challenges facing nursing practice, their effect and possible solution to overcome these challenges. The greatest challenge to nursing practice in Nigeria is the nurse herself. Nurses in contemporary Nigeria are less caring, committed and dedicated to meeting the needs of clients. Most nurses are resistant to change, professional development and advancement. In nursing practice and education, some nurses tend to hold onto previous knowledge and skills without making efforts to improve and maintain new skills. Many nurses are not willing to accept the challenges of staying abreast with education and development of new skills in their areas and levels of nursing practice. Similarly, the natural qualities expected to be found in nurses (punctuality, selfless service, among others) is virtually absent these days. This has serious implication for nursing practice.

Related to this is education; an essential element in all treatment activities and a means of keeping current or progressing aimed at developing individuals who are open to change. Regrettably, a large percentage of nurses are not open to change. This can be stretched   into the training of both student nurses and professional nurses creating an environment where there are no checks and control, i.e. failure to abide by rules and regulations, leading to a crop of poorly trained nurses. Undue favour to some nurses in training by trainers of nurses which is commonplace in the society is an additional challenge. This has direct implication for the nursing care provided by such half-baked nurses. In fact, they become dangerous to patients, society and themselves. The hitherto unqualified educational standard of the basic nursing certificate is also a challenge. This in turn affects nurses’ remuneration which is another obvious concern for nursing practice.

Secondly, the advancement in science and technology will continue to affect the nursing profession. In the past, nurses relied on their experiences, observation and intuition but today, nursing has a defined body of knowledge specific to the profession and continues to develop this knowledge through research and practice as they relate to new drugs, methods of delivery, disease control and prevention through sterilization and disinfection of equipment, and models in nursing, among others. For instance, the knowledge and implementation of the nursing process as a scientific and systematic approach to nursing care has been seen by many nurses as problematic. Some nurses have found it difficult to implement it because some professionals in the health system do not quite understand what it is about. In addition, some nurses have attached a lot of constraints such as shortage of staff and lack of stationery as reasons hindering the implementation of the nursing process which is a tool for improved nursing care. The changing role of the nurse requires continued competence. Many nurses are unable to maintain a high level of individual competence in nursing practice, skill and knowledge, recognizing and accepting responsibilities for individual action and judgment.

Thirdly, a major challenge to nursing practice is policy making on health issues. Most nurses are women and therefore the position of nurses in Nigeria and the value given to nurses’ work are aligned with their position in the society. The nurses of the past were grossly handicapped because of the type of training they received. They were maids and took this feminine submissive roles without questioning, after all, the “Husband is the Head of the Home”. Nurses have traditionally been subordinate to physicians and these have perhaps affected their leadership roles in policy making on health issues. Nursing today is practiced in the midst of other health needs competing for the scarce resources allotted to health. The poor representation and participation of nurses in decision making on health matters will not move nursing forward. This situation must change if our wonderful dreams about the future of nursing must be fulfilled.

According to WHO at the World Health Assembly in May 2004 (ICN, 2004), some advanced countries have approximately 1000 nurses per 100,000 population while many developing countries, including Nigeria, have 10 nurses per 100,000 population or even less. Registered nurses are leaving Nigeria either for family reasons or for greener pastures giving the advanced countries chances to gain while Nigeria stands to loss through this brain drain. The shortage of nurses in rural areas is particularly another constraint. In Nigeria, nurses posted to rural areas feel that they have been forgotten. Many a time, such nurses perform far below expectation. Furthermore, the nursing profession aims at providing quality nursing care by providing a scientific base for the practice of nursing. Thus the need for research has become necessary. Unfortunately, only very few nurses are interested in research even though it is the responsibility of all nurses to do research to improve nursing care. The introduction of Research Methodology as a course in Schools of Nursing has done little for now to make students attach much importance to research projects as most students believe that research ends after school.

It must also be pointed out that some work environment are un-conducive and non –supportive for nursing practice as they lack sufficient facilities and equipment to work with. They also lack sufficient motivational input such as housing, transportation, incompetent supervision, poor working relationship, general moral laxity in the society, undue familiarity with the subordinates with a weakness in disciplining erring staff, among others. Nurses are no longer in control of the immediate environment in which patients are nursed. If quality health care must be provided, then we have to look critically into some of these problems of the physical, social and mental environments.

We must not forget that despite the increasing number of infections, many Nigerians still very much patronize traditional healers and traditional birth attendants especially now that they have to pay for the health service they receive. Even if they come to the hospital acutely ill, they leave much sooner than they did in the past there by increasing the demand on nurses to ensure high quality, comprehensive care before discharge. These challenges indeed have a lot of effects, among which are relapses and complications which are they further challenges to nursing. These have affected nursing care to clients, families and the community at large; many nurses are unable to set priorities for care and assist client in meeting their needs in the most time- and cost-effective manner possible, while ensuring excellence in client care.

Additionally, most government policies do not focus on meeting the needs of the profession because nurses do not fully participate in policy making. Nevertheless, nurses occupy a central position in the health care delivery system. The shortage of nurses in Nigeria and lack of sufficient facilities and equipment to work with are not just a “problem of nursing” but a health system problem which undermines health system effectiveness.

The solutions to these challenges lie in nurses’ hands and in those of policy makers. It is the responsibility of all to join hands to provide adequate funds for regular in-service training and seminars to update nurses knowledge and skills, provide funds to improve existing health institutions and modern equipment, continually focus on delivery of care that is safe, comprehensive and effective, appropriation of funds by the government to Departments/Schools of Nursing for scholarship for nursing students in order to attract more people into the nursing profession, as well as help those already in the profession to have higher education without much financial burden. A blueprint targeted at quickly situating all nursing education programmes in higher institutions will greatly enhance the educational image of the profession and consequently improve remunerations. Nurse researchers should continue to develop and refine nursing knowledge and practice through the investigation of nursing problems.

Finally, I must stress that the nursing profession must remain dynamic in its attempt to meet health care needs of the society. In an address by His Excellency, Chief Olusegun Obasanjo, ex- president of the Federal Republic of Nigeria at the West African College of Nursing Conference on the Theme: Reforms in Nursing Practice in the 21^st center Abuja, March 2005, stated that “the 21^st century nurse should be one that is equipped not only with the basic requisite knowledge and skill to function in the clinical aspect of health care provision, but must also possess the requisite knowledge and skill to function as a team leader, manager of resources, counselors and advocate to patients”. With this in mind, let us strive to make nursing practice in Nigeria, a supportive profession that is interested in meeting the health care needs of its people. There is also a need for nursing to fashion out its own philosophy in the light of this present challenges to quality nursing practice and high level of professionalism. This includes all nurses, irrespective of their qualifications, to come out and speak with one voice 

Last week, at its retreat of National and Resident Electoral Commissioners (RECs) held in Calabar, INEC reiterated its commitment to abiding by the terms of the revised Constitution and Electoral Act. It added however that after drawing up the detailed action plan for the voter registration and elections, the timeline for implementation was too tight.

It was on that basis that INEC started engaging stakeholders with a view to exploring all legal avenues for extension of the time to enable the Commission to deliver on the aspirations of Nigerians for a credible voters’ register and free, fair and credible elections. They affirmed however that they remained committed to the May 29 2011 inauguration date.

Fifty out of the sixty-two registered political parties readily accepted the postponement of the elections from January to April next year. Of course their acceptance of the revised timeline is based on their own lack of preparedness to comply with the timelines of the calendar in the context of the new Electoral Act. Political parties are now required to have decentralised processes for the nomination of candidates for elections. The nomination processes for parties must not only be decentralised but also require actual voting by members. The era of the so-called “consensus candidate”, meaning, imposition by the godfather is ended.

Of course the most serious problem for the political parties us that the new law did not give them enough time for wheeling and dealing in candidate selection. My suspicion is that they are planning ways and means of subverting the new rules meant to enforce democratisation of candidate selection within parties. The future of credible elections in Nigeria relies not only on INEC but also in a sense, even more crucially on political parties accepting to play the democratic game based on agreed rules.

Political parties in Nigeria since 1978 have had a persistent tendency to factionalise and fractionalise. For too long, they have been instruments used for mafia style gangsterism by political entrepreneurs. The key political resources used in the battles for nomination within political parties are state power, money and violence. Godfathers decide on party nominations and campaign outcomes and when candidates try to steer an independent course, they use their favourite instruments to deal with them. The result is that they raise the level of electoral violence and make free and fair elections difficult.

We have sixty-two registered parties today and most of them are small and have little impact on the political process. They exist for one of two reasons – to collect grants from INEC or as fall back party for a godfather that might be dethroned from their current party, mostly, from the PDP.

The extension of time should be an opportunity to closely monitor political parties to ensure that they keep not just to the legal requirements for candidate nomination but also to general democratic norms. Nigerian citizens must strive towards transforming political parties into organisations that are owned, financed and controlled by members rather than godfathers.

Indeed, the godfather syndrome makes it impossible for true accountability to be practiced in parties. The fact that one or two individuals bear the cost of running campaigns and funding of other party activities leads to a privatisation of both party and state machinery because government officials would naturally owe allegiance to the political godfather who “put” them in office rather than to the ordinary citizen.

One of the legacies of the militarisation of Nigerian society and its impact on the political process is the organisation of political parties around personalities, tribe or religion rather than issues. Issue based politics has virtually disappeared from our political landscape. Parties that are not in power have serious difficulties raising funds for their activities. The ruling party is rich because it has access to state funds through government contracts and other creative means of funding.

The new type of party we require must subscribe to the principle that all citizens can freely join and participate fully in all of its activities regardless of ethnic, religious, gender, class, social background or standing and disability. Above all, the practices of the party must conform to the principles of internal party democracy, especially in regard to the nomination of candidates for elections.

You never thought things could go wrong; suddenly your world comes crashing down and the dreaded thought of a break up hovers round your head. He/She meant the whole world to you, gave you meaning, but it is a different story today. A break up is a painful experience and at times, it leaves people scarred emotionally for life because people in troubled relationships have various expectations. Although heartbreaking, there are exceptional circumstances where it is advisable and healthy to go through a break up; but this post is centred on a few lessons to be learnt from a break up/broken relationship.

Several factors could contribute to a broken relationship namely:

• Communication breakdown
• A change in circumstances
• Lack of trust and disrespect
• Lying and cheating.
• Personal Issues
• Pride

The list is endless but the aim of this post is to highlight 7 lessons to be learnt from a break up or broken relationship. In no particular order, they are as follows:

1.    Pull Yourself Together: This involves gaining control of your thoughts and emotions. It’s a difficult phase of life but you’ve got to pull yourself together and the following might help: Acknowledge how you feel and avoid living in self denial. The bitter truth is ‘it’s over’. Although painful, you have to accept it for all the logical reasons.(hmmh!!! am I being harsh here?). It’s perfectly natural to feel sad, left out, possibly cry when going through a broken relationship because a lot of effort, time, love, care, money… has been invested in building the relationship, but it’s important to pull yourself together. You may be causing more harm to your well being, body, mind…. by not acknowledging how you feel.  Once you’ve accepted your feelings, it’s time to loosen your grip and LET IT GO. Interact with people, talk to friends, family, colleagues… about it, get occupied constructively… with the sole aim of starting the healing process. Understand the importance of taking time out to relax and once you are in control of your emotions, do a bit of reflection on the major conflicts that gave rise to actual break up. Did you have any major part to play in the break up? Was there a display of arrogance, selfishness, love lost and is there a possibility of accepting some responsibility? Finally, in pulling yourself together, allow time take it’s course, refresh mind, spirit and heart with a view to strengthening your emotions and boosting your self confidence. Time brings recovery and gives you the opportunity to rebuild optimism.

2.    Appreciate Who You Are: Always remember you are a unique and lovely to behold. You could also spend more time discovering your purpose, who you really are, your temperaments, likes/dislikes…Be yourself; authentic, bold, loving, beautiful (handsome); come on! Appreciate who you are constructively. The following tips may help:

·       Appreciate and fall in love with your body. My friend Lauren explains this further in her post ‘Fall In Love With Your Body Now’.

·       Accept you are unique; a human being with flaws and attaining complete perfection is far fetched.

·       Avoid going through paths that lead nowhere, assuming compromising roles or people pleasing. It’s important you adher to this because you are vulnerable, could be manipulated or taken for granted. A quick note on people pleasing, my friend Jen Smith explains this in a post ‘How To Stop Being A People Pleaser’.

·       Finally, in appreciating who you are, there is a need to care for your body. People become careless with their looks, appear rough and unkempt due to stress, strain excessive frustration as a result of a broken relationship/break up.

The following tips may prove useful in taking care of yourself:

·       Get enough rest each day

·       Don’t abstain from food and drink plenty of water.

·       Go for long walks, listen to music, and get a massage…

·       Develop a routine for several activities.

·       Dress up, look sharp/smart, do not forget to apply your make up properly, get a haircut, shave or trim your beards…

·       Get a manicure and pedicure

·       Be, Look and Feel confident displaying a positive body image.

·       Smile more and frown less...

·       Have good personal habits or hygiene

·       Pamper yourself in the bath with oils, soothing music and skin moisturisers.

3.    Work On Improving Your Self Esteem: Self Esteem refers to the overall beliefs, opinions you have about yourself; the value placed on yourself as an individual and your ability to cope or derive pleasures (happiness) from the basic challenges of life.There is a slight chance of your self-esteem taking a good beating because of a broken relationship or break up. Once a low self-esteem kicks in you lose your self-confidence, posture, ability to gather your thought. The following tips might lift your self-esteem when going through a break up:

·       Be secured in who, what and who you are.

·       Take an optimistic view to life despite your current situation.

·       Show determination to succeed in every phase of your life, not giving up as a result of the temporary setback currently faced in your relationship.

·       Avoid wallowing in self-pity. It is important you learn to be and act responsibly.

·       Begin to focus on and believe in your dreams and if you don’t have any START DREAMING.

·       Be very clear and realistic about your goals and aspirations.

·       Be thankful for things you have, people who love you and have spent time supporting or impacting your life.

·       Turn the experience around. Ideally, the purpose of every experience is to make you a better person who can confidently face whatever life has to offer.

·       Handle the break up properly and in a matured manner.

4.    Connect With Friends And Family: There is so much to be gained from connecting with friends and family.

·       They provide emotional support.

·       Spending time with them reduces the hours of loneliness.

·       They provide listening ears and offer various forms of encouragement.

·       Spending time with friends and family is a great way to get things off your mind in relation to your break up.

In addition to connecting with friends and family you could also seek professional help where/when necessary and the services of a counsellor, psychotherapist, may be employed.

5.    Get On With Life: This may appear slightly controversial; but having the understanding everything happens for a reason and life generally involves facing hurdles and challenges, I submit today, it is important you get on with life Sitting in the corner of your room feeling miserable, hating men or women, getting drunk or hooked on drugs will not bring about any form of consolation. It only makes matters worse and you need to recognise sometimes you cannot find interpretations to the events of life. The following may help you get on with life. I must stress it is not really an easy phase but it can be achieved: 

·       Explore new interests, activities and the possibility of moving back into the realms of dating.

·       Enjoy all aspects of being single again.

·       Face your fears.

·       Sometimes it’s the best thing to do. A break up could be deemed as an acceptable or healthy option for preventing further heartbreaks. eg. cases of lying, cheating……

·       Reach out to others

·       Learn to forgive yourself and your ex although you’ve split up. Don’t feel stupid or worthless at the current situation.

·       Fight the thoughts that tell you that you are a failure and are to blame for the end of your relationship.

·       Don’t waste time on regret.

·       If you’ve got children, please spend time raising them and showing good examples.

·       Define your relationship with your ex.

·       Look for a job, start or finish your degree, find a new flat or place to rent.

·       Start a hobby, go travelling, have a holiday…

·       Get to meet people, go out on dates after a while.

·       Most of all, plan for a bright future.

6.    You Can Be Happy Again: Happiness is important because it improves your mood, alleviates depression and it would take your mind off the broken relationship.

The following tips may help in restoring your happiness:

·       Change your thinking; that will help change the way you feel.

·       If you have children, spend time taking care of them and watch them grow into responsible adults.

·       Make new friends or meet new people.

·       Counting your blessings

·       Positive interaction with children, friends, families and colleagues…

·       Showing genuine acts of kindness to different people

The list is endless and you could kindly contribute to it

7.    Start Again: Get back into the dating race or game lol! And it’s not cheeky.You can do it; so get in there!